WHEN the techniques become second nature, one's romantic, sensual and erotic world starts to unfold. But why is it hard to discuss sex with our partners or our friends? Why can't we talk about these sensuous and erotic escapades?
It is because of repression; the nagging feeling that being sensual and having sex is a bit secretive and should be kept 'sectioned off' from the rest of who we are.
But surely there's nothing sexier than confidence.
Sensual loving begins with indulging and lavishing attention on your body. So, book yourself a quiet night in, turn off your mobile, dim the lights and let yourself relax.
Try a long, hot bath with scented candles and sensual oils, while playing relaxing and uplifting music. Lie back, close your eyes and concentrate on taking deep breaths as we bring you Minissha Lamba's handbag, her body, her adulterous affairs, her school fantasies, her ambivalence about sex, her sensual pleasures, her thongs, her self-indulgent love, her stilettos, her bath essentials, her foot massages - and much more.
Romancing with books
I was someone who in my teenage years read a lot of Mills and Boon and I'd wish, 'Oh my God. If this perfect love only happens to me, like every girl reading Mills and Boons hopes for.' That was my idea of love, that was my idea of romance with a perfect man.
So you set out in your mind the Mills and Boon man who takes over, who knows what you need before you do, who's your caretaker. So you grow up with those ideals and come out in the real world only to find out that such a man does not exist.
That was my first brush with romanticism.
My ideal romance during my teenage years was Tom Cruise. I was crazy about him. Every time I used to look at his posters, I would feel so inadequate because someone like Tom Cruise would have been so far removed from the reality of my world and existence. But then you grow up and you learn to discover that your ideal man could be your everyday man.
The ideal man
Today, I want a man who is completely real, who is not put on and is a self-made man. He should have worked for everything that he is today. He didn't get it easy in life from Papa.
I do not have anything against other men but if both of them were kept equal, I'd be siding with the self-made one.
Romanticism and sensuality
There is a very fine line here. I think sensuality goes very well with romanticism. Therefore, it is a more beautiful part of being sexual. It is a more emotional part of the ideal of sexual.
When women feel stressed, tired or rundown, they often lose the desire to be sensual. Take time to give your body a treat; indulge yourself and awaken your five senses of smell, sound, sight, touch and taste.
Chocolates - romantic, sensual and seductive If anyone is willing to share his chocolates voluntarily with someone else, it means he really cares for that person. That is the bottom line. When someone gives up their chocolates for you, you know that they care.
Chocolates will give you a major headstart on any serious seduction and is one reason why chocolate is the absolute best seller of all time for romantic holidays of all types.
I would love to do a photo shoot with melted chocolate all over my body. You see the sensuality in the picture the moment you see it but, when it comes to taking it off your body, the last thing I'll do is to take a shower in the studio where the shoot is going on.
Fetish about food
Yes, you heard that right. You may wonder what food has to do with improving relationships.
The study of food and how it affects your mood has fascinated and enthralled since time began. Different foods can affect us by calming us, like warm milk, or exciting us, like sugar. With this in mind, it just makes sense that what you eat can have a direct impact on your romantic relationships.
Michelangelo's David sculpture is very powerful. It is very sensual more than sexual, whereas some of Peter Paul Ruben's paintings are very sexual in nature.
When you give a massage, you are creating an intense physical and emotional connection with the recipient. You share a series of touches that result in positive emotions for both of you. This creates a comfortable, two-way bond that can translate into a stronger, healthier relationship.
Sharing a sensual massage with your romantic partner is a great way to strengthen your romantic relationship. Massage allows you and your lover to connect in a very deep way on both the physical and emotional level. The process of learning to share sensual touch can teach you both a lot about trust, communication and pleasure, three of the major building blocks that make up any solid, lasting romantic partnership.
Fall for fragrances
When the company is selling a perfume, it is selling sensuality with it. You wear a perfume to smell fabulous, don't you? You want to smell fab to appear desirable to people who come in close contact with you. You can simply do good with any sports deodorant.
I personally smell good in my Coco Chanel Mademoiselle and my all-time favourite, Calvin Klein Obsession.
Under the water
I felt that my Kidnap songs, Mausam Yeh Awesome Bada and Soniya, would emulate a lot of music videos that female pop stars have already made in the UK or the US like Britney Spears, Beyoncé, Jessica Simpson or the Pussycat Dolls. However, I would rate Soniya as a pop number but the Mausam number can be termed as sensual and a cinematic cliché.
I love being a part of such cliché, where you are under the waterfall wearing your white kurta and you are just going with the flow. Water here becomes very sexy.
I was 15 the first time I had a conversation with my mother about sex. She explained the birds and the bees to me. I was shocked and I never thought it was possible.
There was a time when one used to be shy and reserved about talking on such a topic but now 'sex' has become very clinical. It's a fact of life.
Sex in films
India still needs to do a lot of running around when it comes to sex in films. I mean, it will take a good couple of years to break the shackles of sex.
For the moment, we've got Rakesh Roshan's Kites coming out. I think it's going to be the most romantic and sensual film we Indians would have seen till now in a very long time.
From the West, I liked Dirty Dancing, not because of the name but because of its sensual nature in the dance moves. City of Angels, too, is one of my favourites.
I must say that the physical aspect of love has to be treated beautifully and you can see that happening in our Hindi cinema now and Kites is going to take it to the next level.
The clichéd fruit of sensuality and romance is the grape. Any fruit can be sensual.
Although I am not a great fan of strawberries when it comes to eating, I don't mind doing a seductive shoot posing with a strawberry and cream on top, and believe me, there is nothing overrated about that.
I have no problems when it comes to talking about sex because I am very open on the subject. But although sex may be an open book for me, my relationship may not be. It is too private and doesn't belong to the world. It is mine.
I would love a photographer to catch a person in their private moments. It can't get more romantic and erotic beyond that, because that's when your guard is down. You're just the way you want to be in that moment. You're least bothered about who's watching and who's around you.