THERE was exactly four points on the board when play was abandoned between Mardy Fish and Stan Wawrinka at the BNP Paribas Classic in Hurlingham Club on Thursday.

Quite what the well-heeled corporate types made of forking out for the privilege of watching the court getting a blow dry is anyone’s guess.

The machine in question looked a bit like a vacuum cleaner strapped to the groundsman’s back. It also made a hell of a racket, sorry, and because said groundsman had ear plugs, the crowd’s funny bone got tickled by his mate miming like a clown to switch the thing off so everyone could hear the announcement about the delayed timetable as umbrellas sprouted under the leaden skies.

For the record, the American, currently ranked world ninth, was 40-15 up against a man with a refreshing sense of self-deprecation.

Wawrinka was quite happy to be announced as the ‘Swiss who always loses,” a nod at the Swiss who mostly wins.

For all Roger Federer’s skills, he will never have half the entertaining skills of Mansour Bahrami.

The Iranian is an annual fixture down Fulham way, because he is a one-man tennis version of the Harlem Globetrotters.

They clown around on a basketball court, but the catch is they can really play. The 55-year-old whacked numerous telling shots through his legs in the doubles match where he partnered Cedric Pioline to a 10-8 tie-break over Henri Leconte and Mark Philippoussis and live up to the claim of John McEnroe, who described Bahrami as a ‘genius’.

There was also a classic moment from Frenchman Pioline where he shaped his back to deflect a loose ball perfectly into the hands of a ball girl. Priceless stuff.

In the last match, the Swedes Mikael Penfors and Thomas Enqvist were the 8-6 winners and straight men for Aussie Peter McNamara, who with Jeremy Bates enjoyed the early evening sun a bit too late for the fleeing Range Rovers.

Play tomorrow (Friday) features a singles match between Tomas Berdych and Jurgen Melzer – weather permitting.