Robert Green has no desire to manage when he retires – not least because the QPR keeper would have to be nice to players he detests.
The thought of having to deal with team-mates the 34-year-old has partnered in the past is Green’s notion of room 101.
The Rangers stalwart ran up a record eight clean sheets earlier this season and hopes his team get back to winning ways at home to Yeovil on Saturday.
However, some of the characters that gave his various managers sleepless nights have put a tin lid on any coaching career.
Even though Green enjoyed life at the top with England as well, it is definitely over and out when he hangs up his gloves.
He said: “Having worked with some of the characters in football, and having to be nice to them – and knowing your job depends on you having to be nice to them just doesn’t appeal to me.
“There’s no longevity in managing – and not much sense either.”
Green concedes very few number ones have transferred to the dug-out, partially down to their isolated stance at one end of the pitch.
“I can see what goes on defensively in a game, but 80 or 90 yards away you can have no idea about the attack or how someone scored,” he added. “I guess it’s once a goalkeeper always a goalkeeper.”
The loneliness of the man between the posts has its upsides – not least when opposing fans behind the goal give him grief.
Green explained: “Does abuse motivate me? Yeah it does, I always enjoy getting stick.”
The main source of fans’ catcalling features the one moment Green would rather forget – that infamous pea-roller from Clint Dempsey that fired USA level in the last World Cup.
“Where are we now?” sighed Green. “Four years on, and they’re still shouting about it. You remember it, you keep it in your head, and you remember the other places – you run out in front of the Kop at Liverpool and everyone applauds you. That’s an incredible feeling. You get abuse at some places and not at others, it’s by the by.
“Playing Ipswich at home earlier this season I got dog’s abuse for having played for Norwich. Against Doncaster as well, we scored the winner in the last minute and you think ‘thanks very much, you can take a running jump’.”
There was no joy on Tuesday night when Green was beaten twice late on at Brighton, but the keeper insists there is no reason to give up on automatic promotion – especially if Burnley in second place suddenly lose their two top strikers.
He added: “Who knows what happens when we find our shooting boots and Sam Vokes and Danny Ings get crippled.
“But if it to be the play-offs, we’ll deal with it. Holiday booked? I’ve been in football 18 years, so I know not to make any plans until you know when your final day is.”
