AT THIS very moment I should be tackling an assignment for my course at Brunel University but, childishly, I've let myself off the hook yet again. Just when I was about to start my essay, I've realised (oh dear) I have to write my column instead.
You may think doing an MA as a mature student means leaving behind foolish, childish ways and, well, being mature. Hello to a new, disciplined approach to work; goodbye to the procrastinations of youth.
Well, maybe it works for some, but I've worryingly become master (mistress?) of the diversionary tactic since I became a student again last September.
When I think I just might knuckle down to it, something 'very important' crops up: you know the sort of thing - vital emails, shopping, hair washing, putting the CDs in alphabetical order!
I've been to the theatre four times, including a trip to the Beck Youth Theatre's production of The Music Man (which was, incidentally, very enjoyable).
Eventually I decided enough was enough. I kept a day free and marked my diary 'ASSIGNMENT!!!'
The capital letters and exclamation marks of course meant serious business. I rolled up my sleeves and went to make a cup of coffee.
It was there in the kitchen that I spotted the bananas, all brown patches and verging on the manky. It wasn't an excuse, honestly, more a health and safety emergency. I am now the proud owner of a banana loaf which turned out to be so big that most of it is in the freezer. * Never mind the volcanic ash up there. Down here we are being taken over by traffic cones.
The other day, between Hillingdon and Amersham, an irritated Mr F counted eight lots of the little devils, and no one working.
What's going on? Do they think that just the act of shutting off lanes, and putting endless notices and cameras in our way is as good as actually doing the job? Rather like me writing ASSIGNMENT in my diary and not doing it[2026] * The election's getting rather exciting don't you think?
At this rate, people might even go out and vote. What a victory that would be.
